A good wife can overcome marital issues, if there is no abuse

Omotola Jalade-Ekehinde, who recently celebrated her 20th wedding anniversary, had an interview with The Nation. It was an interesting encounter as the mother of four opened up on her marriage and other related issues.

How has it been, 20 years into marriage?
It’s just been fun. I’m married to my friend and should I say, my destiny supporter. There’s no relationship without its challenge. When people hear that we celebrated twenty years, they think we must be really without stress or anything, but I just want to let people know that if you are determined to do it in life, if you are determined to make it, you will make it. You have troubles in life generally anyway; either with your parents, or with your siblings.

So it’s just like that. It’s a normal thing. Don’t use any opportunity or any quarrel in a relationship with your spouse to justify the fact that everybody says marriage is hard. It’s not any harder, I think, than any other relationship you’ve had in life, maybe with your business partners or with your siblings. I understand that there are some marriages that have more challenges than others. If there is abuse involved, I think you should find your way out quickly. But if there is no abuse, then there is nothing you cannot overcome. Given that, I have had a very wonderful time with my spouse. We’ve just been friends. That’s what matters most.

On having grey hair
Well, I’m 38 years old so I’m not scared. But even if I was 51, that’s not the point. I’m growing younger if you actually think about it. Even babies these days have grey hair. Anyways, that’s not the point. The point is, in life, I think we should all embrace who we are. And I think when people are sufficient or feel sufficient in life, and you feel like you’re achieving, you really wouldn’t be afraid of age.

I think people are afraid to age when they actually look at where they are in life and feel like they’ve not achieved much. They feel like time is running by. I think that’s actually the reason why people are afraid of aging if you really go into it. But if you are contented in life and know that all fingers are not equal and you are where you are meant to be, because you could actually be six feet below. That you’re alive and well in itself is a reason to celebrate age. I don’t think that’s a reason why not.

On her definition of beauty
I think beauty, first and foremost, is in the confidence. If you are a confident woman and you understand your self-worth, I think you are beautiful. That is why sometimes you see some girls that you think, visually, in your own definition, are not aesthetically beautiful.

But any time they walk into a room, everybody turns. And you wonder why everybody is looking at that girl. She’s not even that fine. If you get it together, she is a confident woman. So beauty for a woman, even for men but especially for women, is knowing your self-worth, understanding yourself, understanding your body and working with what you have. Most

women don’t have everything. Even I don’t have everything but there are things that you have, so work with what you have.